It happens to us all, eventually. You wake up, look at your reflection in the mirror, and the person who looks back is no longer in uniform. For some, it’s a moment years in the making. For others, it can be an identity crisis.
When my time came, I found myself a bit adrift. I was in a new environment with new challenges and new opportunities. I’d entered the military when Reagan was president and threw my boots over the wire toward the end of Obama’s administration. My first days were, at times, uncomfortable. I habitually overdressed; finding my style was going to take some time. I was always early; not everyone views punctuality as a virtue. I spoke my mind; again, not something everybody embraced.
Six months into my second career, I was still meaning making – building context of my new world based on the knowledge and understanding I’d amassed in my former profession. I was searching for a way to make a difference. I knew how to succeed in one life, but this was another.
get back to fundamentals
For me, establishing a firm foothold in a new career meant getting back to my roots. It had been a while since I was truly new to a job, but I’d learned a few lessons along the way that might ease the pain. I wasn’t a 22-year-old second lieutenant this time around, and that would help. But the situations were not completely dissimilar: I was the FNG; I didn’t have a lot of experience in my new work environment; and I didn’t really know anyone. On the plus side, no one was sending me out in search of blinker fluid or an ID-10-T box.
Finding success after the military isn’t that much different from when you’re wearing the uniform. It comes down to two things: hard work and fundamentals. The work ethic should come naturally but reacquainting yourself with the fundamentals might require a bit more reflection.
1. Be present.
Show up ready to work, ready to take on any task, and ready to prove your worth. Whatever your reputation once was, you will have to earn it again. Accept that you’re not the one issuing orders and be part of the team.
2. Show candor.
To paraphrase Saint Mattis of Quantico, “Be polite, be professional, and have the courage to speak your mind.” But do so respectfully, and with a healthy dose of emotional intelligence. In other words, read the room, read the boss, and use your candor constructively.
3. Build your new network.
Call it management by walking around. Call it battlefield circulation. But it’s still the best way to get out and connect with people. Take a cup of coffee, bring along some cookies. But walk the halls and talk to people. Get to know them. Let them get to know you. Build that network one stroll at a time.
4. Work out.
For a lot of us, especially after decades of physical training, the opportunity to take a knee is hard to resist. Resist. A good sweat will do more to keep you young than just about anything else. It also does wonders for your self-image and how others perceive you.
5. Find your happy place.
Think about where you are and what you want to do. Take time for yourself, each and every day. Just clear your head and reflect. Embrace your inner calm.
BE ALL YOU CAN BE
And there it is. You’ve established a foothold in your new surroundings. Now what? What do you do next? Now it’s time to reach deep and do the things that made you who you always were.
1. Embrace the (new) suck.
As the new kid on the block, you’re going to feel a little exposed and alone. That’s okay, you’ve been there before. Embrace it. Your time will come, but for now you need to prove your worth. Roll up your sleeves and get your hands dirty. Offer to help others. Volunteer for projects. Learn the organization. And, most importantly, stay positive.
2. Be a problem solver.
Most of us got to where we are in life by honing our problem-solving skills. Put them to work for you in a new environment. Anticipate and resolve problems before they spin out of control. People will learn to listen to you, give them time.
3. Share credit.
You want the opportunity to lead in a new environment? This is where it all starts. When the opportunity presents itself, build the others around you. Talk about what they do. Prop them up. The sense of team and trust that follows will do more for you than individual accomplishments. People who stand with you (and behind you) will have your six when it matters.
4. Be an influencer.
It’s called influence without authority. There’s an entire body of literature on this subject, but it begins with an acknowledgment that you (1) probably have no authority, and (2) limited influence. Build your influence by being a calm (and reliable) voice of reason when it matters most. Be a peer leader and show others that you don’t have to be in charge to make a difference.
5. Grab the brass ring.
In the words of Wayne Gretzky (or Michael Scott, depending on who you ask), “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” Those are words to live by, now more than ever. Don’t play it safe. Do some of that carpe diem stuff and good things will follow. Opportunities will present themselves. Don’t be shy. Jump in with both feet, even if means taking on extra work. Become the example of what right looks like in your new workplace.
Patience and determination will ultimately pay off, but more so being a valued member of the team. Leading often means exhibiting the skills of good followership first. And for most of us, that’s the role that we can expect to assume after we throw our boots over the wire.
