“There is always one more idiot in the group than you planned for.” – Planning Fundamentals
Mail call is always the high point of my day, even more so when I was deployed. Clearly, I’m not alone in feeling that way. There’s even a bugle call for it. So, I’m guessing that mail call was always a welcome break.
On most days.
Late one afternoon, about seven months into a yearlong deployment, the battalion adjutant walked into my makeshift office with an odd look on his face. “Sir, we got something in the mail you need to see.” He handed over a letter with a Congressional seal in the header, never a good sign. As I read through the correspondence – what we call a congressional inquiry in the military – I was somewhat taken aback.
“This doesn’t make sense,” I said. “The inquiry mentions something about not redeploying when we said we would. I don’t think we’ve ever said anything about redeploying.”
“Well,” the adjutant replied, “we’ve got another inquiry that says basically the same thing.” He handed me a second letter, which essentially reiterated many of the details in the initial inquiry, but from a different member of Congress. One is a coincidence; two is a problem.
We took the inquiries over to the battalion commander’s small office, and I handed them over to him. He froze in place, a look of dreadful recognition spreading over his face. Sensing my question before I asked, he explained, “I told the rear detachment that we would be redeploying after six months. They briefed the families.” He looked up at me. “That’s what it was in Bosnia. I figured it would be the same here.”
The Hard Truth
As his response filtered through my brain, a cacophony of conflicting thoughts rang through my head. Who else needs to know? What kind of message do we need to send? How are we going to get out of this mess? Then a single thought weaved its way to the surface.
“There ain’t no purty way to get cow shit off the road.”
It was a brutal reality of leadership shared by one of my senior maintenance warrants over lunch a decade earlier, one of those pearls of wisdom that just sticks with you. A bad situation won’t resolve itself. When things get really messy, you have to be ready to roll up your sleeves and get dirty. Just own the problem and get after it; don’t blame others for the mess.
I was frustrated. I was annoyed. But I also saw a clear path forward. “Let me draft responses to these. This was clearly a misunderstanding. I think I can put together a response that answers the mail without drawing any more attention to this than it already has.”
That night, after the TOC had emptied and the battle captains were engaged in their own pursuits, I sat down and began drafting the response to the two members of Congress. As I typed away on my laptop, I heard a sound from across the room. I looked up to see a sewer rat the size of a cat gnawing on a book. It was going to be one of those kinds of nights.
Leadership Isn’t Easy
We euphemistically call them “leadership challenges.” They’re the types of issues that elicit a sigh, a facepalm, and sometimes a headache. Most of the time, leading an organization is a fulfilling endeavor. Not all the time, though. Sometimes, it’s all you can do to just get through the day.
Those brutal realities of leadership aren’t the types of things you find in a book. You won’t hear them in a class. They are best shared over a good lunch, a hot cup of joe, or a stiff drink. Collectively, they represent the harsh lessons of leadership for which no amount of study can prepare you; you just have to knuckle down and power through.
1. It’s not called likership.
You can’t be everyone’s friend. If you try, you’ll fail them as a leader.
2. You will outgrow people.
Your peer group will evolve. Don’t allow resentment to follow in your wake.
3. Silence is not consent.
People will often stay quiet even when they are violently opposed to you. Listen with all of your senses.
4. Motivation is an art, not a science.
Different people have different motivations. As a leader, you have to learn how to balance individual needs with organizational goals.
5. You’re going to be misunderstood.
Brevity and clarity are the keys to effective communication. The longer you talk and the cloudier your words, the more likely it is that people will miss something important.
6. Ego is the enemy.
Power has a way of seducing us into a dark place. Stay humble and keep your ego in check.
7. Managing personalities is part of the job.
In fact, it is the job on most days.
8. It’s lonely at the top.
The list of things you can discuss with your team is a lot shorter than the list of things you need to talk through. Find a mentor. Buy them lunch. Bring them coffee. Bake them cookies.
9. The right decision isn’t always easy.
Eventually, you’re going to have to make tough decisions that are not well received. When those moments come, full transparency is the only way to lead.
10. There’s no finish line.
Leadership isn’t a 5K race with a tape strewn across the end. It’s a marathon with no end.
After a short jaunt around the building with a baseball bat – that rat ruined a perfectly good copy of Sun Tzu – I returned to my laptop and finished the two responses to Congress. While they would satisfy the inquiries, we would still contend with our fair share of cow shit in the road over the coming months. There was no escaping one simple fact – something that would easily stretch this list another spot – some people just don’t learn from their mistakes.
