Leaving the military brings a decision that can shape nearly every part of civilian life: Where should you live next?
For years, assignments may have determined your ZIP code. Now, you can choose a community based on your career goals, your family’s needs, and the lifestyle you want. That freedom comes with plenty of questions. Where can you find work? How much house can you afford? Will childcare leave enough room in the budget to save?
A September 2026 study from Hines Law offers a starting point. The study ranked states for raising a large family by examining affordability, safety, healthcare access, housing, and other measures of family well-being.
IA took the top spot, followed by ND and SD. Although the research was not designed specifically for military families, its findings can help transitioning service members build a relocation shortlist.
What the Rankings Mean for Military Families
A family-friendly state needs to offer more than affordable housing. Your next community also needs to support your transition from military income and services to civilian employment, healthcare, and childcare.
The Hines Law study considered violent crime, vehicle crashes, reported child abuse, major weather disasters, income, childcare expenses, living costs, and three-bedroom rents. It also examined healthcare access and other measures of family stability.
Here is how its top 10 states compare:
Rank |
State |
Median Monthly Rent: 3 Bedrooms |
Childcare Cost as a Share of Family Income |
Violent Crimes per 100,000 Residents |
|
1 |
Iowa | $1,213 | 16.60% | 233.9 |
|
2 |
North Dakota | $1,365 | 19.86% |
238.1 |
|
3 |
South Dakota | $1,193 | 15.18% |
307.5 |
|
4 |
Nebraska | $1,328 | 23.28% |
218.4 |
|
5 |
Minnesota | $1,589 | 32.25% |
223.5 |
|
6 |
Utah | $1,837 | 18.32% |
235.7 |
|
7 |
New Jersey | $2,159 | 25.13% |
193.8 |
|
8 |
Virginia | $1,808 | 19.72% |
205.9 |
|
9 |
Kansas | $1,288 | 15.96% |
457.2 |
| 10 | New Hampshire | $1,930 | 22.87% |
117.6 |
Source: Hines Law study figures supplied for this article. Statewide figures are comparison points; local prices, childcare arrangements, and neighborhood conditions will vary.
These rankings measure conditions for larger families. They do not measure veteran benefits, military retirement tax treatment, or the availability of jobs matching your experience. Consider those factors alongside the study’s findings when making your decision.
Iowa: A Strong Starting Point for an Affordable Transition
IA earned first place through a combination of relatively low living costs, affordable childcare, and family income. According to the study, IA’s median family income was approximately $96,800. Its cost-of-living index was 87.7, compared with a national benchmark of 100, and three-bedroom rent was approximately $1,213 per month.
For a transitioning military family, those figures suggest a place worth investigating if keeping monthly expenses manageable is a priority. Lower housing costs could provide breathing room while one spouse starts a new job, the other searches for work, or a veteran pursues additional education.
The study also reported that 25.1% of IA homes had four or more bedrooms, which is a useful consideration for families needing room to grow.
The next step is to test those statewide advantages against actual job offers, available homes, and childcare openings in specific communities.
North Dakota: Worth Exploring for Families Who Need More Space
ND ranked second, with a reported median family income of approximately $103,400 and three-bedroom rent of $1,365 per month. The study found that 29.7% of homes had at least four bedrooms. For military families accustomed to moving as their housing needs change, that makes ND worth exploring as a potential long-term home.
However, median family income does not predict what a newly separated service member will earn. Compare salaries for your occupation and your spouse’s occupation before deciding how much housing you can comfortably afford.
Include winter heating, transportation, and travel to visit extended family in that comparison.
South Dakota: Lower Rent Could Help Preserve Your Savings
SD placed third and had the lowest three-bedroom rent among the top 10 states, at approximately $1,193 per month. It also had the lowest reported childcare burden in the group, at 15.18% of family income. That combination could appeal to families planning to rent while getting established in civilian life.
Using the study’s figures, the difference between three-bedroom rent in South Dakota and New Jersey is $966 per month, or $11,592 annually. Actual savings would depend on the community, property, income, and other expenses, but the comparison shows why housing deserves close attention.
A lower rent payment could help protect an emergency fund while your family settles into new jobs and routines.
Nebraska: A Balance of Housing Costs and Safety Measures
NB ranked fourth, reporting three-bedroom rent of approximately $1,328 and median family income of $100,200. Its violent crime rate of 218.4 incidents per 100,000 residents was the lowest among the study’s top five states. That is one useful measure for families comparing communities, though it does not establish the safety of any particular neighborhood.
For transitioning service members, Nebraska deserves consideration where local employment, housing, schools, and healthcare align. Examine the commute between available homes and likely employers before assuming a lower rent will translate into a better daily routine.
Minnesota: Higher Income Comes With a Childcare Tradeoff
MN rounded out the top five, with reported median family income of approximately $112,700 and a cost of living slightly below the national benchmark. Its childcare figure deserves particular attention: 32.25% of family income, the highest share among the top 10 states.
For parents leaving military service, that illustrates why comparing salaries alone can be misleading. A higher-paying civilian position may leave less room in the budget if childcare costs rise sharply.
Before accepting an offer, obtain actual childcare quotes and check availability. Ask about operating hours, school breaks, and whether the provider’s schedule fits both parents’ work obligations.
What About the Other Five States?
UT, NJ, VA, KS, and NH also made the top 10, offering different combinations of cost and safety measures.
KS reported relatively low three-bedroom rent and childcare costs, but its violent crime rate was the highest among these 10 states. NH had the lowest violent crime rate in the group, alongside a substantially higher rent figure.
VA and NJ also illustrate the importance of weighing expenses against employment. A higher-cost location could still make sense if a confirmed job offer, spouse employment, nearby relatives, or access to needed services improves your family’s overall position.
If you’re pursuing work that requires a security clearance, start with the location of suitable openings. Then compare nearby communities using realistic commuting distances and local housing prices.
Build a Civilian Budget Before Choosing a ZIP Code
Your military compensation package and a civilian salary are different enough that a simple pay comparison can miss major expenses.
Build your relocation budget around expected take-home income and actual local costs. Include:
- Rent or mortgage payments, utilities, insurance, and property taxes.
- Childcare, after-school care, and summer programs.
- Health insurance premiums and expected out-of-pocket expenses.
- Transportation, commuting, and vehicle costs.
- Moving expenses, deposits, and initial household purchases.
- Savings for emergencies and any gap between military and civilian paychecks.
Use confirmed income wherever possible. Avoid committing to a housing payment that depends on an unsigned job offer, a spouse finding work immediately, or benefits not yet approved.
Consider Renting While You Get Established
Buying immediately after separation may feel like the natural next step, especially after years of moving. Renting first can give your family time to get to know a new area.
It gives you time to evaluate schools, test the commute, find healthcare providers, and decide whether the community fits your long-term plans.
If you intend to buy, investigate your VA home loan eligibility early. Eligible borrowers may qualify for a VA-backed purchase loan without a down payment, subject to applicable requirements. You will still need to meet lender credit and income standards, and you should budget for closing costs and a possible VA funding fee unless exempt.
A home purchase should fit the civilian income you can document and sustain.
Check the Support You Will Have After Service
Affordability matters, but so does having people and services nearby. Before choosing a community, investigate healthcare access for every family member, veteran assistance, schools, childcare openings, and opportunities to build friendships. Confirm any state veteran benefits through official sources, including eligibility requirements.
Proximity to relatives can also change the calculation. Reliable family support may help with childcare, emergencies, and the adjustment to civilian life.
Military OneSource offers transition assistance, including help navigating post-separation housing and relocation resources. Eligible service members and immediate family members can continue using its services for 365 days after separation or retirement.
Choose a Place Where Your Family Can Get Established
The Hines Law findings give transitioning military families several places to investigate. IA stands out for its overall affordability measures. ND offers a comparatively large share of bigger homes. SD combines lower reported rent with a smaller childcare burden. Your final choice needs to connect those advantages with a sustainable civilian career and the services your family uses.
Start with a shortlist. Compare actual jobs, available housing, childcare quotes, and healthcare access in each community. Visit when possible and involve your spouse and children in the conversation.
After years of living where the military needed you, this move is an opportunity to choose a place that supports your family’s next chapter on your terms.
